A Note To Louise’s Friends

A Note To Louise’s Friends

Louise’s health deteriorated quickly in 2014 and by October she had been relocated from assisted living (where she received wonderful care for seven years) to residential care (read: drugged and immobilized aged folks in queu to die) where she simply lost the will to live very, very quickly. Her daughter Cyndy, a life-long professional caregiver, was at her side, holding her hand as Louise passed on. She may have lost touch with many of her friends in the physical world as her capacity diminished but Louise held each and every one of you close to her heart and in her thoughts up to her final breaths. On Louise’s behalf, thank you for making her life rich and meaningful.

Louise’s Final Years

Louise’s Final Years

Life in Penticton was ideal. Louise’s daughter Cyndy was close in Kelowna and her son William was a few hours away on the coast. Visiting Louise and lodging at her spacious two-bedroom apartment with long balconies and southern exposure was always a joy for her grown kids and grandchildren. Louise’s final years were met with the same day-to-day enthusiasm she had since childhood. Her eyes never ceased to sparkle. She made friends easily. Eventually, Louise gave up her apartment to live at Village By The Station, an excellent assisted living facility in Penticton– with wonderful, caring staff – where she remained until a year before her passing in 2015.

Louise’s Sisters & Brothers

Louise’s Sisters & Brothers

Louise had four sisters – Vi, Ruth, Hazel, and Alice – with whom she maintained lifelong connections despite being placed in different foster homes early on when her parents died. Louise’s fifth sister, Marg was reconnected with the family in her forties and her and Louise made up for lost time. Louise kept in regular touch with ther brothers Art, Stan, Chuck, Wes and Gordon through her life, while brothers Alan and Jeff entered her life in adulthood.

Louise’s Sisters and Brothers – Epilogue

Louise was predeceased by many of her brothers and sisters: Marg in the 80’s; Ruth, Wes, Gordon and Alice in the 90’s; and Chuck more recently. Stan is in care, Jeff and Alan are living (to the knowledge of the author of the website), and Vi thrives in Victoria, close to her children, grandchildren and great grandchildren.

Louise’s Best Friend

Louise’s Best Friend

Louise was the sort of person who others liked to be around and she had many friends from the different areas of her life. Her best friend outside of her sisters Alice, Vi, Ruth and Marg was Margie Goldhar. Margie, introduced to Louise through Duffy in 1971, was well-to-do and lived in a $50,000 house on Capital Hill in Burnaby (by comparison, Louise’s home was $16,000). The kids loved the gregarious Margie whose friendship and generosity enriched Louise’s life for many years. Louise and Margie, along with a couple other girlfriends on occasion, took frequent holidays to warm climates.

Louise Reconnects With Her Siblings

Louise Reconnects With Her Siblings

Louise had re-established connections with the majority of her siblings over the years since their separation in childhood. But in the early 1970’s she reconnected with lost sister Marg, and then brother Jeff, siblings who, upon the death of Louise’s parents, were fostered out so far away that they became lost to their other siblings. Louise became particularly close to Marg, left paraplegic from an automobile accident years earlier. Marg was the life of the party and Louise was a close second. The final sibling to reconnect with the Hayward family was brother Alan in the 1980’s.

Louise In Midlife

Louise In Midlife

Louise and Duffy split up when the kids were in high school. She owned her house by 1975 and wanted more than a lifetime of working for Duffy who by this time loved his race horses more than he did Louise. During her late forties and into her fifties, Louise vacationed often with her sister and girlfriends while supporting herself through jobs including food processors like Nalley’s and Kraft Foods. For the kids, not having to share mom was great. But the exclusivity did not last as Louise opened her heart to men offering no more promise than a bouquet of flowers. She had a few romances culminating with a second, short-lived marriage to a complete idiot in 1980.

Life At The Store

Life At The Store

Louise’s common-law husband Duffy, through his store just west of Hastings and Main, Dumac Distributors, was a wholesaler of imported asian goods: watches, knife sets, clock radios, sunglasses, cheap jewellery, novetly items, pretty much anything that uneducated but charming salesmen could carry in bags or in the back of cars to hawk in bars or at Husky stations along the road. Louise worked long hours 6 days per week at the store while the latch-key kids spent Saturdays dodging drunks and low income seniors on the sidewalk along Hastings, just west of Main.

Louise Meets Duffy

Louise Meets Duffy

Louise was an attractive woman and men would enter the scene regularly. Faced with the responsibility of a woman and two kids, most would flee, but one guy, Jim Duffy, stuck around. Duffy meant security and eventually loaned Louise the money she needed for a house for her kids. He moved in, Louise worked off the money by assisting in running his wholesale store 1/2 block west of Hastings and Main, and the kids, fresh from 4 years in a boarding school (with weekend home privileges) had a new home where they’d see mom every day!

Louise’s Uncertain Years

Louise’s Uncertain Years

There were about 4 years in the 1960’s this author would describe as Louise’s Uncertain Years, for lack of a better term. Here is a young woman without a profession, making an unplanned go of it in the big city with two kids in front of her and a failed marriage behind her. At the advice of a friend, the kids were hesitantly placed in a boarding school where they’d come home on the weekends. Louise moved several times around Vancouver during this period, met her future common-law husband, and by 1970 could envision a future for her and the kids.